Circus Vampire

“You’ve never seen anything like this next act. You’ve seen fire dancers and fire spinners the next act is… well a fire master. Presenting the one and only Ignaciooooooo Flint!” the man in the center spun around in a circle to the empty circus tent as if he were introducing this person.

A slow clap echoed toward me from the closed entrance. “You do have quite a flair for being a ringmaster. It’s too bad that I have that job.”

“Mordria,” the man stumbled over his own shoes falling to the floor. “I… I didn’t mean any offense I just….”

“You just what? Felt the desire to see what it was like to be me? It’s not as easy as being in an empty room,” she smiled her bluish pale skin shining with a strange luminosity that only she seemed to have. He found it unnerving although her other features were equally as disturbing. The stitches near her mouth were certainly not helpful with her frown as she approached him.

“I just,” he swallowed hard as he scrambled to his feet, wiping himself off. “I like what you do, I wish I could do it.” He didn’t look to her, he knew what was coming next. She would reprimand him and tell him to stop dreaming.

“Unfortunately for you young one, in a circus of the damned no one retires. Take me for example. I have been around for longer then I remember. Victim of voodoo and vampirism. I barely keep myself together yet I have not left. I cannot leave and I cannot die. I will be ringmaster for eternity,” she informed him solemnly. No reprimand, no lecture. She was reaching out for his help.

“Perhaps I could do your job. If you let me, give you a break for a few centuries?”

“Haha,” she laughed shortly a smile brought to her face. “That is cute. You cannot handle my job though,” she picked up his shoes, holding them out to him. “The others would eat you alive.”

“Not if you help me,” he pleaded as she dropped the boots into his arms. “I can do this.”

“The woman reached up and stroked the side of his face. “Sweet vampire,” she said smiling to expose her own teeth, “what makes you think that I would let you do my job?”

“You-ou-ou sound so, uh…” he looked hugging the boots to his chest. “You sounded like you needed a break. I guess I was wrong.”

“Oh, I’m tired but you’re scared of me.”

“Who wouldn’t be?” he gulped.

“You’re right,” she smiled darkly to him as he started to back away from her. “If you run you might be able to get away from me. Vampire blood sustains me far better then human blood,” she said with a cocky raise of her brow. The man started out of the tent from the direction that she came in, pulling on his left boot. He continued on holding his right boot in his hand. “Run, run little vampire,” she whispered as she looked over her shoulder.

The man continued to run through the woods between the circus and the small town. All he could hear was the thudding of his footsteps and the branches as the slapped him. He was getting away. She was going to let him live. He started to slow down a smile creeping onto his face as he slumped against the nearby tree. He breathed a sigh of relief, a human action that showed his youth. “I made it,” he said quietly to himself.

A light laugh came from behind the tree, “You can’t think I’d give up that easily could you?” the woman said as she stepped from behind the tree, her black boots quiet even with the underbrush. The man closed his eyes shoving the picture of the woman in the black and white corset out of his mind as he began to pray muttering to himself.

“If you meet her, tell her that I still want to be saved,” she whispered, her cold breath on his neck. He wished this wasn’t his fate, he didn’t want to be stuck there forever but this? The cool lips of death brushed against the skin of his neck. Then there was the searing pain of her fangs as they sank into his neck. Slowly the pain ebbed into a soft numbness as his right shoe fell from his arm and thudded to the ground.

 

PS. Weekend with the family was fabulous. I love you Cricket. I love you Fae. I love you Troy.

The Sooner the Better

The next day with Dexter was an odd one for Elizabeth. She woke up and Dexter was gone which made her panic for a few moments.

Looking around she sat up and slipped off the bed. She slowly approached the door, her clothes abandoned to the floor. As she got closer to the door she could smell the lightest hint of bacon in the air. She opened the door and peered her head out. She didn’t see him but she could hear the tell tale signs of food cooking. She was hesitant about leaving the sanctity of the room but she abandoned it as her stomach knotted painfully in hunger.

Slowly Elizabeth tip toed out into the living area peering around the corner to see Dexter there cooking food. She watched for a few moments before he looked up to her and smiled. “Hungry?” he asked her. She stared a moment longer before she came out from her corner. “Very,” she said to him with a growing grin. “Did we really?”

He nodded as he turned and placed a plate filled with food on the counter for her. He gave her a once over before he went back to eating. “I’m a closet nudist,” she said to him as if she knew what he was thinking.

“I was just appreciating,” he said flipping the burner off. raising an eyebrow she got up onto a chair and picked up her fork before she started to eat looking at Dexter more then she was at her food. He moved like a sheep but under that facade he was a wolf and it amazed her. How did he fit in so well. Even she didn’t feel that comfortable in her own skin. She suddenly felt highly uncomfortable without any clothes on. “How do you do that?” she said pointing at him with her fork and indicating to his whole being.

“What exactly?”

“Blend so well,” she said tilting her head to the side and looking at him like a new angle would help her figure it out.

“I had a good teacher.”

“You’re the prodigy of a serial killer?” she said the shock apparent in her voice as she stared at him with a furrowed brow. The shake to his head brought out a firmer look, the predator within tensing at the question. It was almost too beautiful to watch as he fought the instincts.

“No,” he said to her.

“Then what?”

“My dad knew what I was. I have a code,” he said as if that explained it all.

“Don’t we all,” she breathed at him before taking a bite of the bacon, her wicked alligator grin on her face. She wanted to sink her teeth back into his flesh. Feel how good it was again. “What’s next?”

He looked up from his plate and shrugged. “I don’t know.”

There was a few minutes of silence as they both at. She chewed thoughtfully on the eggs that she was made before she took in a breath to ask the next question, “What if I asked for your help?”

“What sort of help?” he asked setting down his plate.

“Help to get a target,” she licked her lips. This was one of the hardest things she’s ever had to do. She still wasn’t quite strong enough. Last night she strained herself beyond what she imagined and the throbbing in her side was more painful today. She was surprised she even made it through the night.

Dexter stared at her firmly for a long while. As he stared she could feel the blood rushing past her ears, her teeth ached with the sensation, she wanted to close her eyes and imagine the blood dripping over her skin in a rush. The warmth intoxicating. As she took a long blink he spoke, “Okay. Who did you have in mind?”

“His name is Gregory James,” she said to him. “He’s a well to do executive that gets off on raping women,” she said to him. “That’s my code,” she explained. “Men who abuse women.”

He looked down before he looked up at her. There was a darkness there, his eyes seemed more sunken in, his face seemed more hollow. Was she seeing the real thing now? The thought made her heart thump more loudly against her chest as she got excited just thinking about it. “When?” he asked gruffly.

“Tonight?”

Not much originality

So my boyfriend today said I need to focus my site creating juices toward one site and get the traffic up enormously and then from there market and see what we can do about possibly revenuing it and making it to where I don’t have to have a conventional job anymore. Thinking about it, I agree but where to start? I don’t have enough motivation most of the time to keep to one project (my current ten projects proving such a thing) and figuring out a way to drive traffic to my site is elusive to me.

Of course I’m sure the first site that you think I should get going is probably Morrigan’s Madness and that seems almost a good idea. It’s the site I’ve had active and going for the longest and it’s also my blog but I don’t know of much that I could legitimately talk about that would drive more people to my site. I don’t have much originality to be honest. I talk about my strife in life and who wants to hear that? Not even I like to hear myself whine and yet I do it on here like I’m some entitled blogger or something. <_< Not really but you get what I mean.

Then there is my new site splash page Morrgasm which should be some sort of Morrigan content site with links to all of my projects, what I’m working on, what I’m doing. It’ll likely have a feed from here to keep the information flowing. It seems like a good idea but what would I publish to this site to make it worth visiting other then links to my other sites. Transferring content I don’t think is a good thing to focus on but I think that if I make it my MAIN site then it would be worth it. It would be like the ultimate splash page.

Next possibility is to really focus one of my two comic ideas. Those have the most monetary potential if you consider it. There is Morrapocalypse or Wootflakes.
Now Morrapocalypse is the Apocalyptic/Dystopic Comic that is there to both teach you something about surviving a dystopia and apocalypse as well as exposing some cliches. The skin is not done and I have no presence whatsoever but it does have a domain sister of Morrdystopia that has a forum on it.
Wootflakes on the other hand is a geeky little spork that has mostly nerd humor. The skin is done but needs to be re-created and I already have some basis done I would just need to focus on getting them up regularly and advertising it.

My other option is RPers Anonymous which is the site that I have the most focus on but the hardest time finding a software that is worth it and I can’t afford to straight upgrade my server to a VPS to get the software that mostly works and I certainly don’t have a few thousand to throw down to get it made and I’d have to go back to school to get the personal knowledge because all the crash courses that I’ve been through doesn’t really teach me proper security and security is important for what I’m looking for. So this idea is my primary one but I don’t have the money to throw at it.
I guess with this, if I wanted to upgrade, I could do hosting packages for RPers for small fees and it would include cPanel but I don’t know I guess it would depend I’d need enough interest in it to make up for the cost of the VPS. It’ would be something simple like maybe 3 bucks a month or 5 a month with Morr Support. I guess I should see how the free hosting goes first.

Last one is RP Status which is mostly supposed to be an addition to RPA so focusing on it would be silly other then posting to it updates. So it wouldn’t be worth it without it’s counterpart and see above for the problems with that.

I guess there is one other, Faerie Reverie which is supposed to be a site (whenever I finish it) about kids especially my kids even though they drive me crazy. It could be something of an ideas to play with your kids (as I normally don’t see pretty sites like it) but that would require me being a more involved parent and I don’t have time for it most of the time. I’d have to figure out ways to make things fun for my kids without spoiling them.

Another idea is to get Sex is Business off the ground which again would require a little money from me including getting my breasts done like I want to do and fixing my teeth. This one would be the site that I have photos of myself for sell in naughty ways. This is my preferred method but I don’t know how to market a site like this. It would definitely be a ton of fun starting out with certain photos and moving from there but again what to do.

My other domains like Knights of Cydonia, Card Rebellion, and Brain Damage are all RPGs so they aren’t something to make money off of as they are simply hobby. The others Woothappens and Lady Pirate are re-directors to other domains and I just have them for prettiness and show. So needless to say these aren’t options.

Now what do I want to get from my endeavors? Enough money to financially support my ability to stay at home and work on them. This is my end all goal. With that it would give me the ability to do my other desires including writing a book without the drain of muse. So needless to say I’m already blech about this all. I want so much more and I can’t attain it and I can’t make a decision on what to focus on.

I think my primary focus (until I decide) is to get Morrgasm up so I have my proper splash site and to-do list and determine my top priority. Feel free to post your opinion of this here as I’m always looking for feedback and suggestions. If you like an idea let me know and I’ll try and put more weight on that.

Oversensitive… and not in the sexual way

So as always I Morr fuck things up. I swear I have a natural aversion to goods things in my life. It’s like when good things come my way I avoid them like the plague but when bad things come I’m attracted to it like a magnet.

The newest Morrfuckup is that I met this guy (and don’t groan and be like oh one of those stories. STFU and listen) and it turns out that we have a lot in common. Mind you I’ve recently discovered that since I like a lot of things that I have a lot in common with a lot of guys. It’s really easy to find things that you have in common if you have a lot to be in common about, but it’s oddly different. I’m talking right down to the enjoying Hentai and porn here people. But anyways, I digress. So I fucked things up last night and really it is my fault and I know it is. I get overly sensitive especially when I don’t fully understand the gravity of what I’m not supposed to be let in on and it hurts, I’ll add a needless to say that I wasn’t in the best of moods because it was in fact the Anniversary of my brother David’s Death and it always hits me like a ton of bricks when I’m thinking it isn’t coming for me.

ANYWAYS! I got upset for no reason but it was a reason because I didn’t understand and I know that’s part of me but then when I tried to cheer him up he snapped at me and that just hurt my feelings and I’ve been hurt ever since.

Now afterward, this is one thing that we work on different wavelengths on and it’s difficult for me because part of it goes over my head and the other part of it just hits a brick wall and it totally throws me for a loop but he has no mannerisms. Or let me correct and say he has few mannerisms and it makes it hard to read. Now he tells me to just ask but I don’t like to ask. I feel pesteringy when I ask because I feel like that’s all I’m doing but he tells me to do it anyways and the other thing is that I have never been able to take things at face value. Ever. People don’t talk like that. There is always underlying innuendo or something that I’m missing and even with what happened there was because I just didn’t know the difference between upset and freaking out. It’s a big difference and it makes it difficult to know what to do if I don’t know what that difference is. Another difference is when I’m upset, no matter how I’m upset (sometimes even when I tell you to get the fuck away) I want to be cheered up or pushed back on. I like to know I’m wanted and I know he wants me but instead of getting push back I pretty much just fell over.

Zayzie did cheer me up a bit but then I fell right back down the pit when I talked to him today.

So I said mean things that I did and didn’t mean. At least I think so. I’ve been hurt and I’m sad and all cry-ey which is really odd. I only say that because of all of the boys I’ve been with I didn’t cry for too long afterwards or regret it really either. I mean I sometimes wish there were ways to fix it but looking back I’m better off without and I really regret the things I said.

He’s mad at me and I understand. I broke up with him because I was upset.

I’m a Morron.

I feel bad and I love him but I don’t know if it’s fixable. I hate when I can’t fix it.

Another thing is he doesn’t like when I apologize but I apologize a lot. It’s just something I do. Whether it’s because I’m a submissive or I’m genuine or I feel that it’s the way to get everyone happy again. I like when people are happy. I like to be happy so I apologize and he hates it and he snaps at me about that too. I don’t know what to do to fix it as I can’t wipe it away but C’est La Vie.

As always. I fuck everything up.

I am a horrible person. And we weren’t even testing for that.

#Morrfail

NaNo Begins

So the month of NaNoWriMo begins and I am ill prepared and barely aware. >_< I have been sitting, considering what I would write about for three weeks, never making solid plans and now it’s here and I have little to no idea what I will be writing about during the tumultuous time of NaNo. I have nothing more then a basic world idea and the fact that I want to write about it.

Morrfail!

So what does this mean? I need to go crazy about thinking at work on my breaks and my time off of the phones to figure out what direction I will go after work and really hammer some stuff out. On average I will have 2 hours a day to actually get any writing done. I don’t think that I’ve ever powered out 1600 words of writing per day in 2 hours but I’m certainly going to try.

At the moment my ideas are to either continue Supermassive (the novel I started last year) or start one of two ideas. One is a Girls Run the world novel about how their is an STD that kills women or one about how an innocent company creates an overbearing Social media platform that creates a dystopia. I think the former is the one I’ve decided on I just don’t know the perspective I was writing from. I was pretty sure I was going to do it post war but maybe I’ll do it pre-war but at the same time I have to figure out who is writing the story and why. Work will have it in for me. I better start the headache meds now.

Well to the work chopping block and headache and to the NaNo not prepared grind! I can do this!

I Know the Pieces Fit

Elizabeth ran a hand through her reddened hair. She didn’t like it but it was a precautionary measure, just like the colored contacts, the henna tattoo’s and the mass amounts of makeup. She turned herself into a goth because he knew what she looked like. It required a look drastically different enough that he wouldn’t recognize her.

The traits of a good monster was the ability to adapt.
Elizabeth adapted well.
When Dexter saw her he looked again and by then she was gone. She hoped he thought he was seeing a ghost.

Elizabeth had been stalking him for three weeks… maybe four? She was beginning to lose track. Without her steady routine one day ran into the next and then the next and it all seemed like one big exhausting blur of Dexter’s grinning face. Despite her want to connect with him she knew killing him was for the best. Then why did her heart beat so hard when she brushed past him?

He kept her up at night. She wanted his death for fear of her life but she liked him. If there was any other way she’d find it.

The only problem was that she couldn’t live in a nightmare forever.
Dexter was her nightmare.
She was in a living nightmare.
That was why tonight was the night.
There was no more waiting.
No more worrying.
No more dreaming.
If she got rid of Dexter then Elizabeth got rid of the nagging prophesy. She’d be able to fall back into her normal routine again. She’d also be alone again with no hope for a companion.
Life would be better without Dexter.
Life would be worse without Dexter.
At least she believed her life would be better without Dexter.

Elizabeth sighed in frustration and tilted her head toward the floor with a final glance toward her adversary before she rounded the corner to prepare for the night.

She required strength.
She required willpower.
She required sleep.

—————————–

Six hours later Elizabeth was following Dexter through the crowds of one of the many street marketplaces in Miami. She stayed a safe enough distance behind him and looked at things, stopping constantly at booths that looked like she would be interested in. Blend and blend well. It was a tactic one learnt in High School with bullies and brats. She was one of the well blended brats with no money.

Next booth. Next meaningless item that looked vibrantly gaudy, like she did.

Soon Dexter reached the end of the market and he kept going which cause Elizabeth to pick up her pace. She just needed an alley. An alley and the wire in her hoodies pocket. She twisted her fist around the wire as she passed her first opportunity, Dexter too far ahead of her to take it.

Alley.
Building.
Alley.
Building.

Elizabeth’s heart started to race, the darkness inside of her taking complete form. The only thing in her head was her own dark, wide grin and blue eyes filled with a wild fire.

Alley.
Building.
Alley…

Elizabeth released a soft sigh as she jumped throwing the wire around Dexter’s neck using her height as leverage to pull him backward and into the alley. She wrapped the wire as tightly as she could around his throat as he fought her, his elbows viciously jabbing into her breasts and ribs slamming her repeatedly into the brick wall of the building closest to them in the alley.

Elizabeth couldn’t help, during the struggle, that it was uncommon for them not to beg in some way.
This didn’t seem right.
This wasn’t right.

Elizabeth loosened her grip just enough for Dexter to catch a lucky break slamming her into the wall again, a moan of pain escaping her lips as he twisted around holding her against the wall with his forearm on her neck slowly putting pressure. This was it, just a little more pressure and she’d pass out. A little more after that and her larynx would be crushed.

Elizabeth gasped for breath as her hands pushed against Dexter her knee moving for the groin but denied by his prepared thigh. Slowly she felt consciousness slip away from her before the pressure was gone and she was on the ground gasping for breath, Dexter above her rubbing his throat.

What are you doing?” he growled at her.

“What… I have… to, to..” Elizabeth coughed placing her palms on the ground to push herself up, “survive.”

And killing me is the way to survive?” Dexter asked her, helping her off of the ground pinning her against the wall with his imposing form. “I come back from the crime scene expecting to find you asleep on my bed and you were gone. I was going to tell you that you clean up everything very well.” He frowned, “Other then your body disposal but for now you were safe. So what do you mean survive? What are you hiding?”

“I need to kill someone Dexter. I am unraveling inside,” while this was only part of the reason she hoped it was enough.

Dexter’s eyes bore into hers as they tried to read one another. Elizabeth still trying to catch her breath, every nerve burning for rest, to stop fighting and yet to stay awake and fight. She felt so conflicted. She had never been so out of control near someone before. She needed to regain something here. She needed to regain that sense of control she lost in the bedroom with the unfamiliar shoe.

Elizabeth needed Dexter.

Without words Dexter seemed to get the signal, or perhaps he wanted something from her just as badly as she wanted it from him but he pressed his lips messily into hers again his hands finding their way to her hips, her waist pulling her closer to him.

While impulsiveness was the trait of a desperate serial killer she need something to keep hold of the thread that held all of her together. At the moment that something was him. For now, ignoring the nightmares were all she could do.

A small amount of trust could lead to a whole lot of success.
Or a whole lot of defeat.
For now they both won.