So Flaky – and not the wooty kind

So I’ve still been stressed. I think I find it hard to write about my life when I’m stressed. I think that stems from the fact that if I write about my stressful life, while I’m stressed about it, it just makes me MORE stressed. It’s just not very fun to say the least. So any of my loyal followers that like to read my random rants, I apologize. With the stupid stepdad stuff and then the move I’ve just not been all ranty and ravey. Well that’s not true, I HAVE been all ranty and ravey but I just haven’t been motivated to talk about it.

Tonight isn’t bad but I don’t really have much to rave about. That is unless you count my ankle!

So! I’ve been moving the past week and up and down stairs, lift, back pain, exhaustion right? Well this is awesome! I’m sitting here walking down the stairs with a big drawer from the armoire and I seemed to forget how the stairs worked, or the step vanished like in HP because I went from having 3 steps left until the landing to sitting on the landing floor with a hurting ankle and tears streaming down my face

THIS WAS THE SECOND FUCKING TIME THAT THIS HOUSE ATTACKED ME THIS WEEK!

The first time I was sitting down at the computer after a long days work, relaxing on the floor when BAM! the bed frame to my bed came crashing down on my head! (Awesome I just rhymed a little) It cut my head open and I was crying then too. I swear I haven’t cried that much since my husband told me that he wanted a divorce or the last time that I thought about my brother Davey. Sad days in the Morrigan house. Right now I’m hoping that my ankle will improve drastically by tomorrow. I really hate hobbling and I hate not being to help like I should. I’m a strong woman, or not a wimpy one, and so I should be lifting things not frowning and hobbling about when I can’t seem to get something or it hurts because I can’t walk right.

The kids like the new house though. Fae was given her own Harry Potter-esque room under the stairs. It was mostly because she was complaining about it and Grandma is awesome so she gave her, her own room. Grandma-win on this one. She went to bed down there tonight and we’ll see how it works out in the morning. Really I just need to get a job so I can get my own place but the economy in AZ SUCKS!!! Just thought I’d put that out there. Also, the neighbors here are very awesome! Great kid neighborhood and the parents seem very friendly. I didn’t even feel like an outsider, like my kids will be set apart, no, they seem to be fitting right in which is especially awesome.

So, on top of Madness fail I’m also wootfailing at my webcomic. I haven’t updated for a few weeks there either. about the same amount that I’ve been missing posting here. I will be changing that shortly though! I intend to be doing a week of webcomics starting Monday so that you all know that I’m not dead and that I love you for reading my bizarre stuff. I hope that will make up for the weeks miss and keep you reading for the weeks to come.

Website updates?

I’m a domain name addict. I just bought two new domains that will probably sit dormant until I figure out what to do with them. I got Woothappens.com and RPersanonymous.com. I know what I’m going to do with RPers Anonymous, it’s going to be an RP resource forum for both administrators and roleplayers. It will probably start off on something self-hosted but if it grows enough I think I will ask for donations to upgrade it to IPB. (IPB is by far the best forum software in the world) As for Woot Happens I think that I might make it into some sort of site that you can submit your Woot moments and link it to Wootflakes. We’ll see. ^_^

I think that’s it for now. Nighty Night everyone! Unpleasant dreams…. or whatever that Elvira lady used to say.

Melodramatic Morrigan

Okay. So I’ve been a major Morrfail lately and I’ve not been posting in my blog. I’m pretty stressed out but I hope to get back into my groves this week. I don’t think it helps that I’ve been going to sleep at like 9PM, I must be getting old really. The last week or so has been relatively regular except for a few things, like my stepdad serving my mum with divorce papers. Bad day in the house.

So why am I Melodramatic Morrigan? Well last night, while watching Bones *Weird I know but keep reading* I realized something that made me very depressed.  I am twenty five with two kids and no opportunities for romance anymore. I’m going to die by my worst fear, alone. I was just thinking about how impossible it is to hold a romantic relationship with two kids, it’s hard enough without them. I can’t even think of a reason why someone would be interested in me.

So I was thinking about it and I’m 25, not very old, and my life is (proverbial) already over. I can’t image a person that would want to be with me romantically while I have kids, especially kids that are as young as they are. I am a romantic at heart and sometimes watching romantic movies, shows, reading books and all that jazz really hurts. I want would adore having someone romantically interested in me, but I know that isn’t possible for me anymore. I am not sure that I would be able to accept romantic interest without a lot of pushing from someone that is interested in me.

I’m very lonely and I fear I will always be lonely because there may be no room for romance left in my life and even if it showed up I’m not sure I would accept it or recognize it. I want it but how could I accept it?

Forever lonely,
Morrigan

Crashed

Yesterday must have been exhausting because I put my kids to bed at about 7 and I crashed and went to bed with them. Why was I tired? I have absolutely no idea but I apologize now for missing my post last night and will update you now on the fabulous day of yesterday.

Yesterday I wasted 3 more hours at church. The time wasn’t completely wasted as I took my komi-himo (Japanese braiding) with me and that helped a lot with the boredom. I go to please my mother. She needs me right now in this time, after my stepdad filed for divorce. Small things help her feel good, so I oblige with little groaning.

The day didn’t really develop from there. There wasn’t much to do. I know I need to do a little more cleaning about the house, hopefully that will get done today but I mildly doubt it because I really need to get motivated to do it. The laundry is almost done though. That’s always a good thing, especially since about 2/3rds of it was mine from storage. <_< Well C’est La Vie. It will be done soon enough, hopefully before my mum completely spazz’s out but probably won’t be.

I’m insane… IPB Skins?

Okay! So first things first… the first thing on my brain. IPB SKINS! Okay! So I was in the bath, thinking and reading and doing that stuff that you do while you cook in water of your own roast beef filth and I had an epiphany. LETS MAKE IPB SKINS FOR PEOPLE TO DOWNLOAD!! Yeah! After that short psychotic episode I reconsidered that and how stupid it was.

What was I thinking? Not much really. I was thinking about making people poke me via Comments, Twitter Follows/comments, and having people join my site. No! Not stupid but also not something I’m willing to do. I doubt I’d ever complete a theme. I haven’t (technically) finished my Wootflakes theme. So what was I even thinking? Self promotion and themes. I probably COULD do it but I’d need more interest to even consider it.

That out of the way? My day has consisted of cleaning! Well technically it started out being woken up EARLY by my brother who works the graveyard. He woke me to get me to make breakfast, which was terrible because I didn’t make the pancakes right and the bacon was overcooked. After my family tortured themselves through breakfast I watched Zombieland! OMG! AWESOME MOVIE! I think it could have done with a little bit more of the theme park thing that it seemed to advertise but otherwise it was really awesome. I loved how they did the rules and they re-iterated them a lot throughout the movie. It was constantly inconspicuous but I loved the rules and the way they were implemented. <3 you Sparky! You are my Zombie Queen!

Other then a movie and being woken up before a zombie this morning I cleaned a lot. I’m trying to help keep my mum unstressed in her time of divorce. I guess my stepdad filed for divorce a few days ago. Total fail for him because he’s a total douche. I think that if douchebaggery came before him that he went back in time to create it. Stepdad=douche.

Last thing for today? I would like to mention that I fell in love <333 <3333 <333 with Goblins the webcomic when my brothers finally berated me enough to go and read it. NO it’s not bad I am just lazy. I’ve been reading the thing for a few months now and I still love it. Tarol the author is AWESOME!. I watched a live webcast tonight where he talks and draws. He answers questions and all that jazz. He’s really awesome. What else is there to say? He is an artist that I aspire to be like but will never attain because I don’t draw *well* and I am not so entertaining?

So what is my form of recourse? Well I will sit around, brood about it. Think that I suck a lot more. Continue writing my stupid webcomic and pretend that I am just as awesome. It’s about the same thing. The difference? I’m not as awesome. Small price to pay for blissful ignorance. ^_^

Not much else to say. Don’t forget to go look at the new Wootflakes comic and have a good day!

Website Staring Contest

So I went to war (as you probably could have seen from my twitter pictures) and have returned. Unfortunately since I’ve returned I’ve mostly stared at my websites like I didn’t know what they were or where they came from. Perhaps an after affect of pretending like the world hasn’t progressed in a few centuries as of a few centuries ago. It could be the reason why I had to come back from war early.

So… there I was! I was waking up on another frosty morning from war. My kids were making me laugh and I was enjoying there warm and fuzzy company when I find out that my mum had left the previous night. Confused and hungry my kids and I got up to get food.
After we scavenged for something to eat forever (about 5 minutes of looking in totes) we were told to call mom…..
Even more confused I pick up my faerie box, also known as a cell phone, and dial my mother…. it rang…. it rang again…. then she didn’t answer.
So! I left her a voicemail.
A few minutes later my faerie box (cell phone) began to sing the sweet tune of the Mario Brothers melody telling me that someone wished to speak to me from an unearthly realm so I pressed the green button to hear the melodic, depressed voice of my mother. I asked her what she needed me to call her about to find that my stepdad had moved out, taking everything of expensive value (the HD, plasma TV and all of the bedroom furniture) out of the house and spliting.
This was bad… particularly bad since we were at War and the only way we got there was with his truck and a trailer that he used to move the stuff out with.

After all of that amazing stuff we packed up camp and came home.

None of us kids want my stepdad back in the house but mum does so we’re waiting to see. We aren’t going to help much because we think that my stepdad’s douchebaggery crossed the line finally so yeah….. I had a not so good week but its gotten better since I have gotten home and talked to all of my buddies, Neph and Savvy and Sparky and people.

On another note!

I decided to go back looking for a way to earn a decent income online. I truly don’t think it’s possible but I still try while I still look for a job. really what I need to find is an awesome company that needs Internet tech support that can do their work from whereever as long as they have Internet connections, and do that. It would be fabulous. Unfortunately I don’t know if they do that. /sigh Well other ventures will be looked into.

I guess in a sense I have a question for you all…. what would you think about me starting a general tech support service. A small like, 5 dollar fee for me to help tech troubleshoot things for like half an hour. I mean it’s not much but I’m pretty good at what I do so I mean it might be worth it. I’m thinking about looking into it. That or a low cost web design thing. I’m not a phenomenal web designer but I think I do an alright job. I’m going to post a poll and see what you all think…. if anyone actually reads my blog… and I hope you guys give me some good stuff. 😀 Thanks in advance.