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    Strangest Dream (with Nerimon in it?)


    So this morning I awoke remembering a piece of my dream. It was one of the strangest dreams I think I've ever had.


    Now to start off I only started watching the guys youtube videos because he reads Twilight in a way I can understand without torturing myself through actually reading it and I think his commentary is hilarious (and a friend showed it to me) but I've never really watched much more then that, except the Atheist's puzzle thing about two days ago. As for attractiveness, I don't know. I don't think he's unattractive but this is just plain weird.

    So my dream

    The man that was in my dream was Nerimon aka Alex Day. And the dream honestly wasn't very long but weird. I think it was a combination of reading spam yesterday and exhaustion or maybe some subliminal message that I like men that are unavailable (which I already knew and knew why).


    First part of my dream involved this blog and Nerimon commented on my blog. I don't know what it said because, well it was a dream I can't read things in dreams. But I was so excited because I honestly don't get a lot of legit comments but I know it was a compliment on my last blog post. I got all stoked and he started reading my blog regularly and we became friends. Then it's starting to get hazy so I'm starting to lose the dream here. I remember it ended up with Nerimon and I in some sort of bizarre relationship and we were very happy about it.


    Disclaimer: I do not know Nerimon nor think that he reads my blog. I don't expect anything, the above was just a dream that I had last night.

    My interpretation of the dream

    Well I believe it's my brain telling me what I already know. I'm lonely (despite having my kids, it's an intimate loneliness) and I like to be infatuated with men that are completely unavailable to me. Why? Because I don't want to burden someone with my problems and my kids. It's a mean thing to do despite my yearn for romance and intimacy. Being divorced has pretty much solidified my intimate loneliness so I try to make up for it with my stories, obviously my fantasies and my kids. While my kids can't give me the romance and intimacy that I want they give me love which is enough and I know it despite want for more.

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    Why? Because I don’t want to burden someone with my problems and my kids. It’s a mean thing to do despite my yearn for romance and intimacy.


    I don't think that's unfair at all, if someone loves/likes you, they should want to be a part of your whole life, not just the niceties without your kids, anyone else is not really who they say they are :p


    Are you looking for romance/intimacy? I'm sure you don't have much time on your hands because of the kids, but it might be the thing to do, might stop the lonliness (which sucks btw)

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    Yes, it wouldn't be a burden on someone that loves/likes me but at the same time I'm not sure I would get involved to that point. I'm a depressing eventually to be spinster like that.


    No I'm not actively looking for Romance and Intimacy. That's what I want but I find that it's not my priority in life at the moment. I think, in most ways, I'm still healing after my divorce. I didn't want my divorce mind you. I think that I put more effort in staving off an intimate relationship then being open to one. Yeah, loneliness sucks, being unhappy because you're lonely sucks but getting into a relationship before you're ready also sucks. I mean I'm barely getting things in order in life.

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